M&M’s – the most family-friendly candy. Action/adventure – one of the most family-friendly genres. Together, the two are like peanut butter and jelly…in theory, of course. The two were made for each other, right? People get M&M’s mixed into their ice cream all the time at Cold Stone Creamery. Why not get ‘em mixed into a video game the next time they’re at GameStop?

As anyone with a sweet tooth can tell you, it’s the ice cream that makes Cold Stone a success – the candy additions are merely a bonus. So if you were to take a Crash or Jak & Daxter-caliber game, throw it onto a marble slab and mash in some M&M’s, you just might have one of the tastiest games of the year. Sadly, that isn’t what happened with M&M’s Adventure.

Developed as a Mario 64 clone that plays like a tech demo for a game console much older than Nintendo 64 (which came out in 1996, for those of you who don’t remember), M&M’s Adventure doesn’t have a good start, middle or conclusion. The soundless intro tries to bring you into the candy experience by explaining the story. But without the classic voice-overs we know and love from the M&M’s advertisements, we’re left to read a bunch of boring text.

When the gameplay begins, you’ll be greeted by stiff controls, a bad camera system, ugly levels and just one objective. Those of you who play the DS version will notice that the Wii controls are a little smoother, and that the world view isn’t as cramped. But saying that a Wii version of a game is better than a handheld version isn’t saying much at all; in general, M&M’s Adventure is not a good game.

Players may be intrigued – maybe even excited – to see that Red, the lovable, semi-sarcastic (and standard flavor) M&M can sprout gliding wings and fly. Gamers may notice that, in a nod to Mario and Luigi, Yellow – the goofy, shy and peanut-flavored M&M – can jump higher than Red. Green, of course, is no Princess Toadstool (now known as Peach), or a Maria Sharapova, for that matter. But she does carry a tennis racket, just in case a few enemies need to be warded off.

Theoretically, this is fine. A little weird, perhaps, and not exactly screaming of originality. But it’s more exciting than the idea of controlling a goofy, childlike bear and bird duo, the results of which only became interesting when the gameplay superseded the premise. M&M’s Adventure doesn’t get to that point. It’s a game whose box art will surely attract those who not only love to eat M&M’s but love the characters used in its marketing. And then, when you pop it into your Wii, you’ll wonder what in the world went wrong.

The simple conclusion is this: one objective alone is not entertaining. As the controller of three M&M’s characters, you must collect 120 M&M’s candy pieces. Sound familiar? It should (unless you’ve been living under rock candy for the past 13 years). The downside to that goal is that it’s all you do; there are no interesting events to ignite the experience of walking around and grabbing the candy pieces.

A deeper look at the game reveals a much more complex conclusion, one that begins with the sluggish controls and monotonous pace and ends with levels that do not inspire exploration. You may be controlling three of the most popular candy mascots in the world, but you’re stuck inside worlds that are devoid of life, color, or anything else the Wii is capable of delivering. If you didn’t know better, you’d swear M&M’s Adventure was a tech demo for some other project – a project that should play much faster, smoother and provide more entertainment than a simple walk-fest.

Gameplay: 2.3
Unintuitive controls, awkward camera positions, bad level designs and only one objective (to collect 120 M&M's candy pieces).

Graphics: 1.0
These graphics wouldn't have excited us in 1995, let alone 2009.

Sound: 1.0
Quirky? No. Artistic? Not even close. An acquired taste? Well, maybe for someone out there. But most will just be annoyed by the music of M&M's Adventure.

Difficulty: Easy
A scavenger hunt without much of a hunt.

Concept: 1.0
A weak, unexciting action/adventure that could have been designed for any platform any day in the last 10+ years.

Overall: 2.1
Your kids may love M&M's, but there is no chance they will derive anything from this game but the urge to quit and play something else.